Pursuit of Happiness

It has been quite some time that I personally have been feeling a roller coaster of emotions, especially in the last year. While I am aware that certain changes in my life, health, and education might have caused those, I must acknowledge that ultimately, they stem from me not being able to understand exactly what makes me happy, because honestly there are a lot of aspects of life that make me happy but still do not feel enough at times.

This feeling intrigued me, and I put some work into understanding how and why most of the times we try to evade these feelings of sadness and pain to chase happiness. Sometimes they take the form of seeking temporary pleasures, repressing painful thoughts and ideas, or simply displacing negative emotions onto others so we don’t have to deal with the real reasons for the feeling. Honestly, we try to continuously search for happiness in any way possible by indulging in all sorts of activities we view that might work but still end up feeling bizarre about not reaching that ultimate happiness and contentment.

It has come to light how through the years we have been trying to attach “happiness” as something we deserve as human beings. As most of the psychological studies done are by American practitioners and researchers, Allan Horwitz who is affiliated with Rutgers University (America) expressed that American people tend to try superficial fixes to run away from negative feelings to be happy and calm. What this might do is form an impression that humans tend to associate happiness as a birthright reducing the sense of solving deep-rooted issues or learning and re-learning how to get out of them.

As a behavioral studies' learner, I would want to convey how human beings have the ability to adapt to most of the situations they are put into. Yes, some circumstances like the death of a close person or a huge loss in career might take a toll and end up becoming a predisposition for serious mental health problems, other times negative situations can make us capable to fight. There are so many times when we do feel like we have attained that “happiness” which might resemble to milestones that create pleasant feelings like getting that right job or finding true love. But this is not something that stays long with us as we start experiencing a type of emptiness or loss after reaching the milestone. Human concerns start rising! That is when we start fleeing from the sadness and venture out in pursuit of happiness all over again creating a cycle.

We have heard mental health specialists especially, pushing us towards the idea of “feeling the feelings” we experience. As far as I understand there might be a purpose behind it. When we consciously try to feel what is happening to us, it helps us in accepting what has taken place and create responses from it to deal with them. Russ Harris, a medical doctor-cum-counsellor and author of The Happiness Trap, communicates how in reality humans will experience all forms of emotions throughout their life cycle which create a meaningful life.

Also, it helps in creating space and understanding of the feelings of joy and contentment because we are not repressing all the other feelings felt. When we try to gratefully acknowledge what is taking place, we can perhaps recognize that happiness is actually just one of the emotions, we tend to feel in our lifetime and that it cannot be achieved indefinitely.

Resources and evidence

(The Pursuit of Happiness, 2022)

https://thehappinesstrap.com/free-resources/

https://youtu.be/e-or_D-qNqM- Don't chase happiness. Become antifragile, Tal Ben- Shahar

Cover photo- <a href="https://storyset.com/web">Web illustrations by Storyset</a>